3-a

Wow, it has been a wild and crazy ride since the last post. It has been a year. What to tell you all (the three followers that I have). Well, I became the Executive Chef at the Marriott Singer Island. I worked there as the Executive Chef from August until June 14th of this year. That's right of this year. "What happened", well ..it happens...It was a shock when they first told me that my position was eliminated! I was literally moved to tears. I was heart broken, I was beside myself. It was like the doctors just told me that I had only months to live. I have gone through a lot of emotions to say the least. One emotion that has stayed with me through and through "something bigger and better to come!" So, what have I been doing with myself, hmmmmm plenty of reading and sending out resumes. Lots and lots of resumes, my goodness I am waiting for when I hit submit a whole bunch of sirens and balloons to shoot out from my computer and I am whisked off to Disney World for being the one millionth resume. Other than sending out resumes, I have been reading still. A lot more then usual. I have been gearing up for tastings if they ever come about. I have been pushing myself to become better at Excel, food costing, labor porforams and cooking in general. Just like last posts, making myself a better chef.

It is very hard lately to remain positive, when you send out so many resumes and hear nothing back. Even recruiters have not called me back, but it is the down time in the biz. I keep thinking about someone very close to me. What this person has had to endure? What they have lost? What might the future hold for them? I am humbled by what they are going through. I sit and wonder what I would do if that were me. I have gained and lost time and time again in my life, if you do not believe me scroll down and look for yourself what I have gone through. But, I now realize, without a job you start to feel like there is no meaning to your life. This same person said once (and they are not at all known for being quotable) "I do not mind paying taxes, it means you are making money!" How profound those words hit me now. To not have a job is like you are inadequate, you do not give to the community as a whole. You do not have money to buy things which would be taxed and that would go to the county and state to pay for, okay enough with the Economics class, you get my point. It is so easy for we; as humans, to fester in our own poop (trying to curb my use of the bad language). I do not know if this person will ever see this post, maybe unless I read it to them or tell them to come here to read it. But I know what you are going through, maybe not to the full extent but I realize what you are going through. Just know that being angry is just an emotion, you have to move on through all the stages of the death of your job. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and lastly acceptance. I can tell you that I am not looking forward to collecting unemployment, it will be the first time I have ever had to. I have been to the point that I have had no money in my pocket waiting for my paycheck and driving on E...I vowed never to let that happen to me again. But I am scared, honestly, scared because I gave my heart, blood (went to the hospital twice at the hotel once carried out), sweat (yes we all know that I am a sweater family trait thank you papa) tears for that place. I ended up working 14 to 15 hours a day running banquets, 1 outlet that served breakfast and lunch another one that did just lunch, opened a pizzeria in a matter of a week, room service and the associate kitchen as well. I did all that with just (one hellva Sous chef)another chef. But, I realize now, I have to be who I am and no one can take that away from me. You know who I am talking to right now, just because you have no job, and you are going through what you are going through, you are still you! Under all that, you are you! You have mention to me "oh, this person wow they have really turned out to be such a sweetheart!" Wonder what they think of you! Not, to be mean in any way or disrespectful, but negativity is not your strongest trait.

Yes, I was dealt one shitty (out the door with watching my typing) ass hand! I know that. But it is because I am no where near where I am supposed to be at. It is like with any relationship that we have and lose, we have to walk away with an open heart. How can I get another job if I am negative? Who the hell would want to be around me if all I am is negative? We all have choices no matter what!!!!I have been told for years, that I will be the same as my father was to me as his was to him and so on. I have always said back, Ted Bundy's parents didn't kill people or teach him how to. When I heard that I would be the same as my father, I thought, I am my own person I can either follow what he did or not, but the choice is up to me. I am not saying my father was horrible believe you me he is my number one fan, trust me. He is also my worst critic behind myself. Yes, it is hard to remain positive when you gave so much and then you have only one year on your resume so who is going to look at someone that jumps from one to another; to that I say, YOUR LOSS! I got the hotel from here to over here, the next chef has a great staff to guide and I know with the changes taking place there it will get to where it needs to get to. It just sucks on how it happened. I beg of you (again you know who I am talking to) seek to change the vision that you see in front of you. It is only you that can change the way in which you see the world around you. Every morning when you get up, ask yourself, I chose to be positive or negative this morning? If more of us as a whole did that, what kind of place would this be? You are not only hurting yourself, more importantly you are destroying relationships around you. Open your heart and mind to switch the way you see yourself and let others help you get there. What has happened to you sucks just as much or if not more than happened to me, but be the bigger person and turn the negative into the positive that it is. Remember the beginning of this blog, it was like the doctors told me I had months to live, it was my wake up call to slow down, watch the flowers grow, or the wind. Yes, I said wind, I marvel at what is around me now. How much time do you get to spend with loved ones? When we worked like I worked not much, if not at all. Take everything day by day, and know that I am hear for you as well.

What's next for me,well, I am still working on the TV show idea and I know that it will be a hit. Maybe that's what is next for me, who knows. Reading, imaginating, inventing, creating that is what is next for me. I have started to blog more on Cheffrey's page on facebook so that will continue, and this will continue as well. I have to, only having three followers is not me at all, after all I am Cheffrey. Until next time think outside the box and what happens is a learning experience. Take every day as if it was your last, how much more would you get out of your day if you did just that. Sorry, not much about food mostly about reflection and trying to help out someone very close to me.....

Cheffrey